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One day you find yourself alone. The reason may be divorce or the end of a long-term relationship. Your stomach cramps, your head hurts and your heart feels like an anchor at the bottom of a vast ocean of sorrow. The minutes and hours of each day tick by slowly with an expanse of nothingness staring you down. Take a small amount of time to weep, rage, cuss, scream and carry on like a banshee. Get it all out until nothing is left but a clean slate on which to begin a brand new chapter.

Step up the power of serenity by repeating a mantra of your own choosing, but make it uplifting and healing.

It’s important to not let your feelings stay hidden in a deep well of emotional denial. Let it happen, feel it, examine it and then move on. You’re thinking…but how? How do I forget? You’re not going to forget, but you are going to reclaim your life from the pitiful plight of someone with a broken heart.

Begin by pampering yourself. Give yourself lots of tender loving care. If you’re not sure how to pamper yourself, begin with a list.

List what you love
Take your favorite pen and a piece of stationery you’ve been saving for a special occasion and make a list of at least 50 things you love. Put down everything: taking bubble baths, shopping for shoes, flying a kite, petting puppies, traveling to an exotic location, eating chocolate, going to a spa. Some of things on the list may be too outrageous to actually do, but find a way to visit Tahiti without actually going there. Could you buy a book or rent a travel video about Tahiti? If you love chocolate, but know you can’t treat yourself to a box of chocolate every day until the hurt diminishes, give yourself permission to have one chocolate day. Indulge yourself for just a day and then move on down the list to a new favorite thing. The key is to pamper yourself with something you love every day for at least a month.

Plan a party
This may sound a bit odd at first and too difficult to pull off when you feel as though your heart has been ripped out and stomped on, but hold tight and you’ll discover the secret. Grab a notebook and pen and plan out the perfect party. Plan the party for a month or two down the road. Think of a theme, what food you might serve and how you would decorate. You’ll find yourself having something to look forward to and growing excited over the possibilities. In a month or two you’ll be more than ready to throw the best party ever.

Meditate
Meditation soothes the spirit in a calm environment that you create for yourself. Find some time in the morning or evening to sit down, close your eyes and think of nothing. Block out all the minutiae of the day, clear your mind and find your inner peace. Step up the power of serenity by repeating a mantra of your own choosing, but make it uplifting and healing.

Let people in
Sometimes it’s hard to allow others into the inner sanctum of our own pain. Allow your friends to be a shoulder to cry on, thoughtful listeners and merry clowns to help you find light and laughter. Go out with them to dinner, a movie or a concert. Let your family and friends pamper and nurture you and share the load just a bit. What seemed nearly unbearable will become less heavy.

These are just a few ways to reclaim your life after a divorce or the end of a long-term relationship. It will feel like walking through fire at times, but when you reach the other side you’ll discover you’re still you and you still have a whole lot of love to give to that someone special when the opportunity presents itself once again.

Need help sorting through the pain? Objective, insightful guidance from an experienced AskNow psychic might be just what the doctor ordered.