“Why won’t he make a commitment?” she asked.

When I pulled the Lovers Card for Nancy, I knew that we were meeting on the phone to discuss her relationships.  Nancy had had many tarot readings in the past which had given her great guidance, but now she was truly in a state of panic about a relationship that seemed to not be developing the way that she thought it should.

“Why won’t he make a commitment?” she asked. 

As we worked and I was able to use the tarot deck and my psychic connection with Nancy and her beloved, I realized a deep fear.  Her beloved had been hurt by a previous relationship and was terrified that he would be hurt again.  He also found it hard to express these things to Nancy because he was afraid that he was not man enough to handle his problems.

I advised Nancy that it was time for her to back off a bit so that she didn’t frighten him so much.  Instead she was to take a different approach and build a trusting friendship.  As I told her while giving her relationship advice – it is easier to love a friend that you trust.  I felt that Jeff truly did love her, he just was afraid that she would abandon him like his last wife had done.  I am happy to say that after about six months of working on her friendship with Jeff, he popped the question and they will be getting married next June.  As Nancy said: The good guys are worth waiting for.

"You were right.  I met the greatest guy Saturday and I would not have met him if I had not taken your advice..."

Jane had her life planned out. She graduated from college and found a great paying job. She worked hard and succeeded. Yet something was missing.

With everything that she accomplished Jane felt that she was a failure. As she had created security for herself, she had forgotten about love. And as she heard her biological clock ticking she wondered if she would ever find love.

As we talked, Jane realize that in planning her life she had been so busy focusing on goals and creating a sense of power that she had lost her vulnerability. She would sometimes put others off that might have been her perfect soul mate because she was focusing on creating a security that she never felt as a child because her mother, a single parent, had to work two jobs just to make sure that Jane and her brother would be able to live and survive. Jane had promised herself that she would never put herself in that position when she was a woman.

As we worked together to explore her new goal for life, to find love and romance, Jane discovered the real boundaries to love were created by her fear of depending on another person for her security. As she and I talked she recognized that only a powerful woman can afford to be vulnerable.My relationship advice was that she start accepting invitations from friends to go places and to quit focusing on finding love because she would just push it further away. I also told her that as soon as Venus came to a conjunction of Jupiter in her seventh house, she would discover love. I especially emphasized that Saturday, the fourth, would be an extremely opportune time to find the love of her life.

On Monday, Jane called me and was totally ecstatic: You were right. I met the greatest guy Saturday and I would not have met him if I had not taken your advice and went out with my girlfriends.

"She was torn between wanting love with Mr. Right that she had often settled for Mr. Right Now. "

Tamara told me that her one question she wanted to ask was: Will my lover contact me again? When I told her Yes she was truly upset.

You see Tamara like many of us had found herself in a toxic/unhealthy relationship. A relationship that her family and friends were truly concerned was not good for her. Like many people Tamara wanted so much to be in a healthy and good relationship and she knew that the person she had recently broke up with was not good for her. She was torn between wanting love with Mr. Right that she had often settled for Mr. Right Now.

As we worked together Tamara was able to discover why she was setting herself up for relationships that would fail. She learned how to love herself more so that she felt worthy of a really good relationship. In all of her relationships whether with lovers, friends or family, she always put herself last as she tried to please others. Over a period of time, she learned that if she did not put herself first and take care of her own needs, she was not ever going to find someone who would love and respect her. When Tamara and I last talked she informed me that she was in a new relationship where she truly felt loved and treasured.

When Tamara fell in love with herself she was finally able to find a soul mate that would share her journey of joy through a healthy and happy relationship. She also discovered that when she learned to say no, the universe was giving her more possibilities that said yes to her discovering happiness.